What happens during MEMI?
I’ve noticed that more people in Singapore have heard of MEMI (Multichannel Eye Movement Integration), mostly through word of mouth from friends or family members who’ve experienced it.
But if you haven’t experienced MEMI yourself, it may sound quite mysterious or even like magic! So what actually happens during MEMI?
Identify the Issue
Like Brain-Switch 2.0, MEMI can be “content-free”, which means that you don’t need to tell me the details of the memory. But I’ll need to know at least generally what you want to work on so I can figure out if MEMI is suitable, e.g.:
“My father passed away last year, and I feel so guilty.”
“My partner had an affair a few years ago, but I still can’t get over it.”
“I was fired from my job recently, and it’s really affected my self-esteem.”
I’m also here to listen and support you if you want to tell me more. It’s completely up to you.
Project the Image
When we think of a memory, we usually have an image in our minds, e.g.:
Watching your father take his last breath in hospital
Catching your partner in bed with a third party
Your boss’s face when they told you you were being made redundant.
I’ll ask you to “project” this image onto the wall behind me, like you’re watching a movie.
You won’t need to describe the image to me unless you want to. Instead, I’ll ask you some content-free questions about it, e.g. whether it’s in colour or black and white, what sensations you feel in your body, what key emotions you associate with it.
I’ll also ask you to give a score for how intense or distressing you find the memory.
MEMI Eye Movements
This is where the magic happens!
I’ll ask you to follow my pen with your eyes as I make various shapes - lines, triangles, circles. We’ll do a few sets and check progress in between.
In MEMI we don’t aim to get the score to zero because we know that the changes keep taking place after the session. Also, it’s normal and healthy to feel some residual emotions about distressing events.
What does MEMI feel like?
If you haven’t done MEMI before, it can feel a little odd to be moving your eyes in different directions, what we call guided eye movements.
Some people experience a slight tingling or buzzing sensations in their head. Most people find the eye movements relaxing. I’ve even had clients fall asleep!
What’s the effect of MEMI?
Typically, clients find that the projected image becomes patchy or dark. Often they can’t even “see” the image on the wall anymore, even with their glasses! 🤓
For some clients, the image changes to something more positive and uplifting.
Generally, clients feel more calm when they think about the memory, and healthy thoughts spontaneously arise, like:
“It’s over now; it’s in the past.”
“It’s really sad that happened, but it wasn’t my fault.”
“It was painful, but it made me who I am today.”
For some clients who have been used to traditional talk therapy, where you talk about the issue with a therapist over several sessions, it can take some time to process the changes that have taken place internally.
I find that MEMI works so naturally and at such a deep level that some clients even forget how distressed they were at the start of the session! It’s as if they’ve always felt this way - a sense of acceptance about an event that is now in the past where it belongs.
And that’s what I love about MEMI.
MEMI at Home
For clients who are interested, I also teach them a simplified version of MEMI that they can do at home.
We all experience annoying or upsetting incidents day to day, like being shouted at by your boss, being ghosted after a date, having an argument with your mum.
If we can learn how to process and clear away such incidents by ourselves, we’ll have clearer hearts and minds, and build resilience. And we’ll save money on therapy!
Curious to try MEMI? WhatsApp me to find out more.
Eunice Tan
Trauma & Attachment Psychotherapist, Free From Trauma
I help people heal from hurts that keep them stuck.
Resources:
Introduction to MEMI by Dr Mike Deninger (video)
How MEMI Helps with Grief & Trauma (Instagram Live with Fertility Support SG)